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Liberty. Freedom. America.

Every candidate in every political party will use those words, trying to make you believe that their party is the patriotic choice (and therefore the only choice).

I will not.

I will not tell you that, if you are a true American, our party is the only option. I will not say that a vote for me is a vote for George Washington, or Abraham Lincoln, or Chuck Norris. I will definitely not state that to vote for my opponents is to vote for Communists or Nazis. I will not say any of that, however true it may be.

I will, however, tell you what a vote for me does mean.

It means minimum taxes and maximum protection of your privacy.

It means minimum gun control regulations and maximum liberty.

It means a free market for business. It means letting states try out education ideas and not forcing the federal government's ridiculous tests on all kids. It means protecting doctors from lawsuits when they were just trying to save a life.

The poster you see here says that we are Americans, and we can live and thrive on our own, without the government's help. And if the government tries to stop us – don't tread on us.

My party's mascot is the Converse. Yes, that probably seems a bit silly, but think about it. It is the minimum of a shoe – flat sole, some fabric, and shoe laces. Yet it is the most awesome shoe out there. That is the way government should be. It should be the absolute minimum, staying out of our businesses and out of our lives, and when government is at its minimum, it is awesome.

If you vote for me, --- ---, the Neo-Libertarian candidate, I can promise you this: I will get the government back to the size it was supposed to be. I will get the government out of our lives. And we shall be awesome, and we shall be free.
This is just a speech I gave today to my history class and a bunch of sophomores, running for president in the class. I was getting bored and feeling useless in the Republican Party, so I decided to form my own Libertarian Party. (One other kid ended up joining me.)

For the record, America is pronounced with a strong Texan accent on ever syllable save the first. Maybe it's just at my school that we say that... Also, the poster I reference in the speech is my hand-drawn version of the preview picture.

I don't know why I wanted to post it... Maybe because I like it, and I don't like much of what I write. Anyways. Approval? Criticism? Unbrindled laughter at my failure?
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Submitted on
October 25, 2011
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